Man Bites Dog; Cat Answers Phone

During J-school, my friend Holly and I talked frequently by phone. Those conversations may be the only thing that got me through the program. We tried various forms of coercion—food, coffee, fantasies of killing professors—to keep each other going.

One night, when we were writing 25-page term papers, Holly called my apartment. The phone rang several times before someone picked up. Then silence.

"Janine?" Holly said. "Hello? Janine?"

"Meow," came the response. "Meow. Meow. Meow."

"Janine? Are you there?" Holly asked. "Janine, are you OK? Are you there?"

"Meeoooowwwww," Lancelot answered.

When I returned home later that evening, I saw the phone off the hook. Huh, I thought. I must have knocked it off the bedside table. Very soon after, however, I received a call from Holly. "Your cat answered the phone," she said, recounting the story. "We had a great conversation. He's quite a talker. Now that I know you're alive, it's all that much funnier."

Holly and I have often laughed about this story, but did you know other cats have made telephone calls? One cat dialed 911 and saved his companion. This story sounds more like my Lancie, though: he just liked to chat. When I'd come home from work, I'd often ask him about his day. He'd always answer the same way (after all, what else is there to say when you sleep all day?). I also asked him every morning whether he wanted his breakfast. And my favorite question: "Do you love your Mommy?" and always, "Meow."